Mental Health Care During the Pandemic: How to Survive 'Social Distancing' Without Consequences

We are preoccupied with the coronavirus – the pandemic has penetrated all spheres of our lives and it seems that nothing is more important than how to avoid infection, how to protect ourselves.

We wake up in the morning and go to bed at night with coronavirus on our minds. During the day, we follow news about the number of infected and deceased, frantically buy and stock up on groceries, and again we ask ourselves – have we done enough?!

Community and solidarity – the mantra of the new era which, incidentally, has brought divisions that even history rarely sees – are falling by the wayside in the face of 'social distancing' and self-isolation imposed by the need to protect ourselves from the coronavirus.

With good reason. If the Chinese and Italians, for example, had started self-isolating earlier, perhaps the picture would have been less dramatic. Perhaps – an addition to every sentence we utter about the coronavirus because this time we are dealing with the unknown.

Precisely the fact that it is an unknown phenomenon that even billions of dollars worth of technology, brilliant minds, and think tanks cannot yet unravel is what makes us, to put it colloquially, nervous.

Since we cannot control the coronavirus, can we at least minimize the 'nervousness' and prevent it from getting out of control and developing into anxiety, fear, obsession, phobias... given that the frightening data and bad news seem to have no intention of transforming into good news, at least not anytime soon. 

If we focus most of our precious mental energy every day on being careful not to get infected, we are already on the path to becoming more or less anxious. Daily messages about the need for caution and news about the number of deaths (those who were not careful, at least that's how our brain decodes the message), as well as life in isolation, although necessary, further affect the state and health of our psyche. 

Healthy social contacts, which are otherwise healing for anxiety and fear, are reduced to a minimum, and in some cases even forbidden, which only increases tension. By washing our hands thoroughly and avoiding company, we reduce the risk of infecting ourselves or others. But what can we do to preserve our mental health in the long term, and at least improve our mood in the short term and strengthen ourselves to cope with isolation and frightening messages?

1. Maintain contact.

Phone, email, social networks – however much they have distanced us from face-to-face encounters and isolated us until now, they are now more useful than ever. Communicate, express what you feel to people with whom you feel safe, show genuine interest in their condition. Try to take a step forward by stepping out of your usual circle of contacts and call someone you haven't heard from in a long time – surprise both yourself and him/her. Seek comfort, but also offer it. Relationships are a two-way street, balanced scales. In a situation like a pandemic, we are all in a similar situation, and perhaps you are in some kind of advantage.

What kind of advantage? Think about it.

2. Nurture your partnership.

In times of crisis, people either grow closer or drift apart, even separate. This happens precisely because of the previously mentioned change in daily routine, which leads to exiting a kind of trance in which we act on autopilot – we live life without deep analysis of our surroundings, including partner relationships. The trap that most couples fall into also leads to us taking our partner for granted, as if it were a given, and it is precisely at this point that friendship and respect begin to transform into habit and alienation. 

If the partnership is based primarily on respect and friendship, that relationship will be your key support in times of crisis. The same applies to friends. Pay attention to your partner – friend, seek support and comfort, but also offer it. Do you even know how your partner truly feels about the current crisis situation?

How can you help him/her?

3. Manage information.

Not everything you hear is true, nor is everything you say true. That is the only truth. If you do not 'cleanse' and 'polish' your own auditory and visual filters, your systems will be attacked by an inflammatory cocktail of information – from accurate and verified to inaccurate, unverified, confusing, contradictory, frightening. It is difficult to distinguish them, especially if you are already upset and scared.

In a crisis situation like a pandemic, in the phase we are currently in, all information is somewhat frightening, especially sensationalist information that serves to increase readership of a medium (e.g., a shocking headline that simply forces you to open an otherwise empty and uninformative article). And sensationalism 'sticks' best to our senses because it excites us. However, the choice is ours – we can select sources of information so that we primarily receive verified data that will contribute to our realistic picture of the world around us.

In addition to news, choose comedy shows, do not suppress laughter due to the superstitious belief that you might 'cry it out', listen to your favorite music.

Have you made such a choice?

4. Care for others.

A well-known ancient remedy for escaping one's inner 'inferno' is caring for others. If it is not exclusively motivated by the motto 'good deeds are rewarded with good deeds', whereby you can only become more upset and disappointed if good does not 'return' for your care, then active interest in others and help within a reasonable framework are healing. This way, you step out of your own vicious circle that prevents you from seeing others and their life situations, redirects your attention, and encourages action which, if absent, makes this advice lose its purpose. Action, on the other hand, should be balanced and in accordance with our capabilities so as not to become a compensatory activity in which we become 'saviors' just so we can feel better. Help is not only money but also interest, advice, praise, a handshake, a pat on the shoulder (the latter two are excluded until the epidemic passes).

Who have you helped recently?    

5. Life goes on – live today, plan for tomorrow.

When we are anxious, we usually ask questions like 'how will I...', 'how will...', 'what will happen...', etc. – so, we are always a step into the future but with apprehension, fear that is dysfunctional because it paralyzes us and can make life unbearable. True, we don't know 'how we will' because in every situation there is a dimension of unpredictability, but when we start to believe that thanks to our own inner resources (or sometimes with the help of others) we can cope with any situation – anxiety begins to recede. Therefore, let's live now and today, let's plan for tomorrow, because – whatever tomorrow brings, we will be able to deal with it. As always.

Anxiety does not tolerate change; it grows in the face of change, especially unplanned change. The change in daily routine, which otherwise makes us feel like life is passing too quickly, is a good thing. It gives us an opportunity to pause and, after the initial shock and upheaval, move forward. However painful it may be, a crisis should be accepted as a welcome guest because it shows us what is not good in our lives, what needs to be changed, what is functional and what is not.

Use the time at home for some self-reflection on how your life settings are functioning. Perhaps the crisis situation will provide you with some key insights about what you can do without, what you want, and what you absolutely need.

Are you ready for positive change?