Mr. Reilly, don't be Murphy: Two threesomes are too many in BiH political pornography!

By: Rasim Belko @rasimbelko

Two threesomes under the same roof. No, you haven't missed the page and no, this isn't one of those triple X combinations. Unfortunately for all of us living in BiH, this isn't a story about sex games either. This is political pornography in which diplomatic pimps tie up political minors, alienated from the people and reason, at the table, who are supposed to bring us dawn in this dark region of ours. And no one is taking care of clearing the weeds from the roof before the political pornography. For three decades, the veins of weeds have been intertwined, and for the last two years, Murphy's Threesome has been holding them on theatrical ropes. The weed, a Herzegovinian weed that answers to the name Dragan Čović, is an insurmountable obstacle for the political swingers of Bosnia and Herzegovina.

But, Mr. Reilly, I admit – there is something exciting about you deciding to actively participate in the production of our political porn. But let's be honest, every soap opera has its limits, and every political pornography has its worn-out poses. Here, we have two threesomes – one for ruling, the other for patching up the collapsed system, and both for temporarily satisfying international voyeurs. And it's becoming disgusting.

You see, Mr. Reilly, Murphy's Law states: If anything can go wrong, it will. And in Bosnia and Herzegovina, that law has been upgraded, expanded, and translated into constitutional annexes. Here, not only will things go wrong, but as soon as you think the worst is over, some new "threesome" will appear – to remind you that the bottom has no end.

And here you are, Mr. Ambassador, tirelessly trying to make a European respectable government out of a compromised, half-collapsed, amorphous political group. You add a little political viagra, pump them with loans and nods, and they – just can't get it up. Neither the economy, nor healthcare, nor justice, nor education. The only thing that rises is the number of cronies and public procurements.

And now you are announcing a new "threesome", this time politically more impotent than Murphy's, which is supposed to save Bosnia and Herzegovina. Mr. Reilly, don't be Murphy. His shoes are too small for you, just as threesomes, even double ones, are not potent enough to deal with serious, problematic pimps. Murphy's threesome could not, knew not, or did not want to deal with Čović and Dodik; your threesome plus Murphy's does not know and cannot deal with Čović. Because in that combination, there are political prostitutes who would rather work for Čović than for the state.

Therefore, both threesomes are bad porn actors, ready to play the role of moral integrity for a little position, grants, and sinecures. And you want to experiment with them with our Euro-Atlantic path and the fate of the country. It's an unwatchable film, Mr. Reilly, so unwatchable that BiH society is on the verge of breaking. Both psychologically and in terms of security.

This country can no longer tolerate experimental poses and posers. Every "threesome" ends up as a gang-bang on the citizens. The first deceives you with Dodik, the second with Čović. And while you and others wonder why no one here believes in democracy anymore, the people are asking only one thing: how much will the next "consensus" cost us?

Don't be offended, Mr. Ambassador, but as long as you and your predecessors form governments with political prostitutes, while ignoring those who genuinely want to make this country normal – every threesome of yours will remain an ordinary pornographic scene for international reports. With us as extras in the group sex.

And therefore, Mr. Reilly, don't be Murphy. Don't teach us to live in chaos, knowing that when you return home, you come back to an organized system.

It is said, Mr. Reilly, that there are options by which you, like Murphy before you, will try to use Mr. Schmidt and order him to disrupt the existing constitutional and legal order, only at the state level.

Don't do it, Ambassador, because Schmidt no longer has any credit in this American-British production's porn. What credit, homeless people have more respect in this society. Mr. Schmidt, with his decisions from the first to the last, has become the first diplomat to successfully unite all peoples and citizens of Bosnia and Herzegovina. And he is probably the only one who has united our politicians as well. Because no one likes him, as he resorts to Solomon-like solutions to satisfy everyone, and no one is satisfied.

No political pornography will save Bosnia and Herzegovina, Mr. Ambassador. Instead of this futile effort, start applying the rules of states and institutions where you are trying to push us as a country. Stop choosing for us personally, but if you want to help us, then do so and help us make the rule of law a reality, shorten and speed up the path to NATO, the EU…

Only in this way will you prevent Bosnia and Herzegovina from becoming a permanent experiment of a diplomatic penal battalion, which, frustrated by being stuck here, invents solutions that are unnatural and unsuitable for any normal country.

Therefore, Mr. Ambassador, if you don't know how to save this country, at least stop directing such bad films for us. Because Bosnia and Herzegovina is not your private production. And remember: a bad director is ultimately remembered more for missed shots than for celebrated scenes. If you don't believe me, ask Murphy!